Discover the Key to Raising Emotionally Resilient Kids
By Psychologist Alana Watson
Parenting is one of the most significant influences on a child’s emotional development and overall well-being. How we parent shapes how children learn to navigate the world, manage their emotions, and build relationships. The Tuning into Kids program identifies four distinct parenting styles, each with unique characteristics and effects on children’s development. Understanding these styles can help parents reflect on their approach and consider adjustments to foster healthier relationships and emotional growth in their children.
1. Emotion-Dismissing Parenting
Parents with an emotion-dismissing style often view emotions—especially negative ones—as unimportant or something to be quickly fixed or ignored. This approach typically includes statements like “Stop crying, it’s not a big deal”, or “You’re fine, don’t be upset.”
Impact on Children:
Children may feel invalidated and learn to suppress their emotions, leading to difficulty recognising and regulating their feelings. They might grow up believing that emotions are unimportant or problematic, affecting their relationships and mental health.
2. Emotion-Disapproving Parenting
Emotion-disapproving parents take the dismissive approach further, actively criticising or punishing children for expressing emotions. This might include statements like “Stop being so dramatic,” or “Go to your room until you calm down.”
Impact on Children:
Children may feel ashamed of their emotions and learn to hide them. This approach can lead to lower self-esteem, difficulty forming secure relationships, and problems managing stress.
4. Emotion Coaching Parenting
Emotion coaching is the parenting style recommended by the Tuning into Kids program. It involves recognising, validating, and guiding children through their emotions while teaching problem-solving and self-regulation. Emotion coaching parents might say “I can see you’re feeling really frustrated. Let’s talk about what’s bothering you,” or “It’s okay to feel sad. Do you want to tell me what’s making you upset?”
Impact on Children:
Children feel valued and understood, which builds strong emotional bonds with their parents. They develop emotional intelligence, including skills for constructively identifying, managing, and expressing their feelings. They are more likely to demonstrate resilience, empathy, and positive social behaviours.
Why Emotion Coaching Matters
The Tuning into Kids program highlights that emotion coaching is not just about soothing a child in the moment but about teaching lifelong emotional skills. Children who experience emotion coaching are better equipped to handle stress, form healthy relationships, and confidently approach life’s challenges.
Reflecting on Your Parenting Style
Our own experiences and cultural influences often shape parenting styles. It’s normal to recognise aspects of multiple styles in your approach. However, shifting towards an emotion coaching style can profoundly benefit your child’s emotional development and your relationship with them.
At Emotional Growth, we offer the Tuning into Kids program to help parents develop emotion coaching skills. Through practical strategies and expert guidance, this program empowers parents to navigate emotional moments effectively and build stronger family connections.
Ready to Learn More?
If you’re interested in exploring how the Tuning into Kids program can help you enhance your parenting approach, you can contact us at [email protected]. Together, we can support your child’s emotional growth and create a more connected and harmonious family environment.